A Year in Reflection: From Challenges to Dreams of Magic

As I sit here on New Year's Eve, the house quiet and Tim resting peacefully nearby, I find myself reflecting on the tapestry of experiences that have woven together to create this past year. The warmth of the fireplace casts a gentle glow, inviting me to look back on the moments that have shaped us, challenged us, and ultimately strengthened us.

This year has been a journey of stark contrasts. My 62nd birthday came and went, a milestone that once held the promise of an approaching retirement filled with ease and joy. Instead, it marked a year in a life dramatically altered by Tim's PNES diagnosis. Our world shifted, becoming a bubble where the edges of reality often blur, each day a reminder of the injustices he faced and the ongoing battle we fight.

The struggle has been real and relentless. Balancing Tim's care with a full-time job has pushed me to my limits. There are days when being civil to those who caused Tim's suffering feels like an insurmountable task, yet I persist. It's a delicate dance of survival, advocacy, and self-preservation.

Amidst these challenges, there have been moments of profound beauty and resilience. Like the quiet evenings by the fire, where tears flow freely but are followed by a renewed determination to stand firm in our fight for justice and well-being. These moments remind me of my strength, even as I acknowledge the weight of our circumstances.

As the year draws to a close, I find my thoughts drifting to happier times – our magical trips to Disney World. Those precious days where we could shed our adult worries and embrace our inner children, laughing and playing without restraint. In those moments, life felt light, joyous, and full of possibility. The memory of walking down Main Street, U.S.A., surrounded by the sights, sounds, and smells of pure happiness, serves as a beacon of hope for what life can be.

Looking ahead to the New Year, I carry with me a complex mix of emotions. There's weariness from the battles we've fought, but also a deep well of love and determination that continues to fuel our journey. I dream of a future where Tim finds peace and his seizures diminish, where those responsible for his suffering face the consequences of their actions, and where we can find our new normal.

But more than that, I dream of recapturing some of that Disney magic in our everyday lives. While we may not be able to live in that enchanted world permanently, I'm committed to finding ways to inject moments of joy, wonder, and childlike enthusiasm into our days. Because even in the face of adversity, there's always room for laughter, love, and a sprinkle of magic.

As the clock ticks towards midnight, I make a silent promise to myself and to Tim. We will continue to fight for his rights and our well-being. We will cherish the quiet moments of peace and draw strength from them. And we will never lose sight of the joy and wonder that life can offer, even in its most challenging chapters.

Here's to the New Year – may it bring healing, justice, and moments of pure, Disney-like magic to brighten our days. We've weathered the storms of this past year together, and together we'll step into the future, hand in hand, ready to face whatever comes our way with courage, love, and an unwavering spirit.

A Journey of Faith

As I reflect on my journey, I am filled with gratitude for the unwavering mercies of the Lord that have accompanied me through every trial and triumph. The phrase "I will sing of the mercies of the Lord forever" resonates deeply within me, encapsulating a commitment to celebrate His faithfulness in both good times and bad.

Life has often felt like a series of fires—moments of intense challenge that tested my strength and resolve. Yet, through each trial, I have felt the steadfast love of the Lord walking beside me. It’s a love that does not waver, even when the path ahead seems uncertain or fraught with difficulty. In those moments, I have learned to hold tightly to His never-failing hand, finding comfort in the knowledge that I am not alone.

This steadfast love has been my anchor during turbulent times. When faced with adversity, whether it be the struggles surrounding Tim's health or the challenges of navigating a toxic work environment, I have found solace in prayer and reflection. In those quiet moments, I have felt His presence enveloping me like a warm embrace, reminding me that there is purpose even in pain.

The mercies of the Lord are evident in the small miracles that occur daily—the unexpected kindness from a stranger, the support from friends and family, or even a moment of peace amidst chaos. These blessings serve as reminders that His love is always at work in my life, guiding me through the flames with grace and compassion.

As I continue on this journey, I am committed to sharing this message of hope and resilience with others. Just as His love has walked me through fire, I want to inspire those around me to recognize their own strength and the mercies available to them. It is a powerful reminder that we are all capable of overcoming our struggles when we lean into faith and trust in something greater than ourselves.

In moments of doubt or fear, I find myself returning to the promise of His steadfast love. It reassures me that no matter how difficult the circumstances may become, there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Each day is an opportunity to witness His grace and mercy anew.

As I move forward into each new day, I carry with me this commitment: to sing of His mercies forever. It is not just an expression of gratitude; it is a declaration of faith that shapes my perspective on life. With every heartbeat, I will celebrate His unwavering presence in my life, holding tightly to His hand as we navigate whatever lies ahead together.

In doing so, I hope to inspire others to recognize their own journeys through fire and encourage them to embrace the mercies that surround us all. Together, let us lift our voices in gratitude for the steadfast love that walks with us through every season of life.

Embracing Our Inner Child

Dreaming of Disney brings a smile to my face as I settle into the warmth of nostalgia, reminiscing about all the magical trips we've taken to the happiest place on Earth. Each visit was a whirlwind of laughter, joy, and pure childlike wonder, where we could let go of our adult worries and embrace our inner kids. There’s something incredibly freeing about stepping into that world, where the cares of everyday life fade away, replaced by the enchanting allure of fairy tales and adventure.

I can still picture the moment we first walked down Main Street, U.S.A., the scent of popcorn wafting through the air and the cheerful sounds of laughter and music surrounding us. The excitement was palpable as we made our way to our favorite rides, each one a ticket to a different adventure. Whether it was soaring through the skies on Space Mountain or spinning wildly on the Mad Tea Party, we were fully immersed in a realm where imagination knows no bounds.

What I wouldn’t give for life to feel like Disney all the time! A place where every day is filled with magic, where our biggest concerns revolve around which ride to experience next or whether to indulge in another churro. In that world, we could laugh without restraint, play without hesitation, and love fiercely without the weight of responsibilities pressing down on us.

The beauty of Disney lies not just in its attractions but in its ability to remind us of what it feels like to be truly alive. It’s a world where dreams come true, and every corner holds a new surprise waiting to be discovered. I often find myself daydreaming about those moments—watching fireworks light up the night sky, sharing a laugh over silly souvenirs, or simply enjoying each other’s company while wandering through the parks.

As I sit here reflecting on those experiences, I realize how much I long for that sense of joy and freedom in my everyday life. If only we could bottle up that Disney magic and sprinkle it over our daily routines! But even if we can’t live in that enchanted world permanently, I cherish those memories and hold onto them tightly. They remind me that no matter how challenging life may become, there’s always room for laughter, love, and a little bit of magic.

So here’s to dreaming of Disney! May we always carry that spirit within us—finding ways to inject joy into our lives and allowing ourselves to play like children again. After all, life is too short not to embrace our inner child and enjoy every moment as if we're wandering through a magical kingdom.

A Quiet Resolve: Reflections by the Fire

As I sit here in front of the fireplace, the house is enveloped in a rare moment of quiet. Tim is resting peacefully, and I find myself lost in thought, reflecting on the tumultuous year we've endured. The gentle crackling of the fire provides a soothing backdrop as my mind wanders over the challenges we've faced.

This past year has been a test of endurance. Tim's diagnosis has changed everything, and I've found myself juggling his care, my full-time job in a toxic workplace, and the desperate need to maintain my own sense of self. It's been a delicate balancing act, one that has pushed me to my limits time and time again.

The hardest part, without a doubt, is seeing the faces of those who tormented Tim, knowing they're responsible for his current condition. Every day, I have to summon the strength to be civil to them, to maintain a professional demeanor when all I want to do is confront them about the pain they've caused. But I know I can't. This job is our lifeline, and I can't risk losing it, no matter how much it pains me to keep silent.

I've always considered myself strong, but lately, I've begun to wonder if I'm nearing my breaking point. As I sit here, watching the flames dance in the fireplace, I feel the tears begin to flow freely. It's a release I've been holding back for so long, afraid that if I start, I might not be able to stop.

But even as I cry, I know this moment of vulnerability is fleeting. Soon, I'll have to dry my eyes, stand up, and continue the fight. Tim needs me to be his advocate, to stand up for his rights and ensure he gets the care and support he deserves. We need each other now more than ever, and I'm determined to keep us safe and together, no matter what challenges lie ahead.

The road before us is long and uncertain, but as I sit here in the warmth of our home, I feel a renewed sense of purpose. Yes, I'm tired. Yes, I'm frustrated. But I'm also filled with a deep, unwavering love for Tim and a fierce determination to see us through this difficult time.

Tomorrow will bring new battles, but for now, I allow myself this moment of quiet reflection. I'll draw strength from the peace of this evening, storing it away like a precious resource to be called upon in the days to come. Because no matter how hard it gets, I know I must keep going. For Tim, for myself, and for the life we're fighting to reclaim.

Reflections on the Aftermath of Christmas

As the last echoes of Christmas carols fade into memory and the decorations are carefully packed away, we find ourselves in a familiar yet poignant space. The holiday season, often celebrated with laughter, warmth, and togetherness, has come to an end. For many, including ourselves, this period can evoke a sense of solitude and reflection. We may have spent another holiday alone, surrounded by the silence that follows the festivities. Yet, within this solitude lies an opportunity for profound introspection and renewal.

Being alone during what is often considered a season of connection can feel isolating. It can stir feelings of sadness or longing for companionship. However, solitude also offers a unique chance to engage with our inner selves. In the quiet moments that follow the holiday rush, we can reflect on our values and beliefs. We can ask ourselves what truly matters to us and how we wish to contribute to the world around us.

Despite the challenges of solitude, we must not allow our circumstances to diminish our faith and hope. Faith is not merely a belief in something greater; it is also a commitment to our principles and ideals. It is about holding onto the belief that goodness exists in the world, even when it feels obscured by loneliness or despair.

Hope is our companion in this journey. It fuels our desire for a better future and inspires us to act with intention. Even when faced with isolation, we can choose to nurture hope within ourselves and extend it outward toward others. This hope becomes a beacon, guiding us through darker moments and reminding us that change is possible.

In a world that often feels divided and disconnected, our commitment to kindness and acceptance becomes even more crucial. Each interaction we have with others presents an opportunity to share warmth and compassion. Whether it’s a simple smile exchanged with a stranger or a thoughtful conversation with someone in need, these gestures can create ripples of positivity.

By choosing to be kind, we not only uplift others but also reinforce our own sense of purpose. Acceptance allows us to embrace diversity in all its forms—recognizing that every individual carries their own stories, struggles, and hopes. In doing so, we cultivate an environment where everyone feels valued and understood.

As we move forward from this holiday season, let us carry with us the spirit of giving—not just in material terms but through our actions and attitudes. Let us envision a world where kindness prevails over indifference, where acceptance triumphs over judgment, and where hope ignites change.

In every encounter we have—whether brief or lasting—we have the power to influence lives positively. By embodying these values in our daily interactions, we contribute to a collective vision of a better world. Our commitment to kindness can inspire others to do the same, creating a chain reaction that transcends our individual experiences.

Christmas may have passed, but its essence does not need to fade away. While we may find ourselves alone during the holidays, we are never truly isolated in our mission to spread hope and kindness. Let us embrace this journey together—committed to nurturing faith within ourselves and sharing it generously with those we meet.

In doing so, we transform solitude into solidarity, turning moments of loneliness into opportunities for connection. Together, let’s build a world where hope flourishes and kindness reigns supreme—a world worth celebrating every day of the year.

A Message to All

As I reflect on Tim’s journey with Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures (PNES) and the challenges we’ve faced together, I want to share some key thoughts that encapsulate our experiences. This journey has been filled with moments of struggle, but it has also illuminated the profound strength of love, hope, and redemption.

Tim’s battle with PNES has not just affected him; it has transformed our lives in ways we never anticipated. Each episode is a reminder of the unpredictability of this condition and the emotional toll it can take. In witnessing his pain and frustration, I have come to understand the importance of being a steadfast source of support. My promise to him—to never stop fighting for him, holding his hand, being his lighthouse, and loving him—has become a guiding principle in our lives.

Alongside Tim’s health struggles, we have also faced the heartache of familial rejection. The feeling of being deemed worthless by those who should love us unconditionally creates a deep emotional void. This experience can lead to questioning our own worth and place in the world. Yet, even amidst this pain, I have learned that healing is possible and that we are all deserving of love and acceptance.

In reflecting on our journey, I am reminded of the powerful story of the baby in the manger. This narrative serves as a beacon of hope, illustrating that no one is beyond redemption. God’s gift of His son symbolizes unconditional love and invites us to embrace our inherent worth despite our past mistakes. It reassures us that transformation is always possible.

Throughout this journey, I have discovered that hope exists even in our darkest hours. By choosing kindness over cruelty and love over indifference, we can create ripples of positivity that uplift ourselves and those around us. Our experiences have taught us that healing is not just about overcoming obstacles but also about embracing our journey with compassion and understanding.

As we navigate these challenges, it is essential to remember our collective responsibility to support one another. The world can often feel heavy with hatred and violence, but by embodying compassion and empathy, we can contribute to a more loving environment. Each act of kindness has the potential to spark change and transform hearts.

In sharing these reflections, I hope to convey that our experiences—both painful and beautiful—are woven together into a tapestry rich with meaning. We are reminded that we are worthy of love; we are capable of change; and we are never alone on this journey.

Thank you for being part of this journey with us. Together, let’s embrace the light that shines through even the most challenging circumstances, finding strength in our connections and hope in our shared humanity.

The Gift of Love: A Reflection on the Birth of Christ in Bethlehem

In the humble town of Bethlehem, a moment unfolded that would change the course of history forever. This was not just the birth of a child; it was the arrival of the greatest gift ever bestowed upon humanity. The Father, in His infinite love and wisdom, chose this quiet setting to introduce to the world His Son, Jesus Christ—the King of Kings.

As I reflect on that sacred night, I am drawn to the profound simplicity of it all. A newborn lay in a manger, surrounded by the warmth of animals and the awe of shepherds. Here was a King, not adorned with jewels or crowns, but wrapped in swaddling clothes, embodying humility and grace. This act was a divine declaration: salvation had come down to us in a form we could understand—vulnerable and pure.

Come behold Him. This invitation resonates deeply within me. It beckons us to witness the miracle of love incarnate. In a world often filled with chaos and uncertainty, we are called to pause and reflect on the significance of His coming. The King of Kings took off His crown—not in defeat, but as an act of love. He set aside His heavenly glory to walk among us, to share in our joys and sorrows, and ultimately to offer Himself as a sacrifice for our salvation.

The imagery is powerful: Love came down. It is a reminder that true power is not found in dominance or authority but in selfless giving. Jesus exemplified this through His life and teachings, showing us that greatness lies in serving others. He turned societal norms upside down, teaching us that the last shall be first and that our worth is not measured by worldly standards.

As I contemplate this gift, I feel a profound sense of gratitude. The Father’s love was not just for a select few; it was for you and me and every person who has ever lived. The birth of Christ signifies hope for all humanity, an open invitation to embrace grace and redemption.

In this season of reflection, I am reminded that we are called to share this gift with others. Just as the shepherds spread the news of His birth, we too are encouraged to proclaim His love and light in our lives. The greatest gift in history continues to impact hearts today, urging us to live out our faith with joy and purpose.

So let us come together in awe and wonder at this incredible truth: that in Bethlehem, amidst simplicity and humility, Love indeed came down for us all.

A Promise of Unwavering Love and Support

Tim, my beloved, as we navigate the challenging waters of your PNES journey, I want you to know that you are not alone. Your struggle with Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures has brought unexpected waves into our lives, but it has not diminished the strength of our bond or the depth of my love for you.

I see the pain in your eyes when an episode strikes, the confusion and frustration that follows. I understand that PNES is not just a physical battle, but an emotional and psychological one as well. Your seizures are real, your distress is valid, and your journey is acknowledged. This condition, often misunderstood by many, has tested your resilience in ways you never imagined, but it has also revealed your incredible strength.

In the midst of this storm, I make this Christmas promise to you: I will be your constant, your unwavering support, your lighthouse in the darkest nights. When the world seems to spin out of control, my hand will always be there for you to hold. I promise to stand beside you through every appointment, every therapy session, every moment of doubt and fear.

We're in this battle together, Tim. I will never stop fighting for you – for your health, your happiness, and your peace of mind. I'll be your advocate when you need one, your voice when words fail you, and your strength when you feel weak. We'll face each challenge as a team, celebrating every small victory and supporting each other through every setback.

My love for you is not contingent on your health or the frequency of your seizures. It's a love that grows stronger with each passing day, with each obstacle we overcome together. I promise to love you through the good days and the bad, to cherish the moments of joy and to hold you close during times of distress.

While PNES has brought uncertainty into our lives, it has not dimmed our hope for the future. Together, we'll explore every treatment option, from cognitive behavioral therapy to other promising approaches. We'll work with your healthcare team to find the best ways to manage your symptoms and improve your quality of life.

When the world feels overwhelming, when the weight of PNES seems too heavy to bear, remember that you have a safe harbor in me. I'll be here to listen without judgment, to offer comfort without condition, and to remind you of your worth and strength when you forget.

Tim, my Christmas promise to you is this: I will never stop being your lighthouse, guiding you through the stormy seas of PNES. I will never stop holding your hand, whether it's trembling from a seizure or steady with newfound confidence. I will never stop fighting for your well-being, advocating for your care, and supporting your journey towards healing.

And above all, I will never, ever stop loving you. Your PNES does not define you; it's merely a chapter in our story, one we're writing together with ink made of resilience, hope, and boundless love.

As we face the future, know that you are cherished, you are strong, and you are never alone. Together, we'll navigate this journey, finding beauty in our bond and strength in our unity. My love for you, Tim, is as endless as the horizon and as constant as the North Star. This Christmas and always, my heart is yours, and my support is unwavering.

A Holy Night: The Birth of Our Savior

On that quiet holy night, when the stars shone brightly over Bethlehem, the world was forever changed with the birth of our Savior. In the stillness of that moment, a little child entered the world, bringing with Him a promise of healing and hope. His arrival marked a new beginning, one that would resonate through the ages and touch the hearts of countless individuals.

This child, born in humble surroundings, carried within Him the power to heal not only physical ailments but also the deeper wounds of the human spirit. He came to mend broken hearts, to offer forgiveness, and to restore relationships. In His presence, people found solace and understanding; they experienced love that transcended their struggles and fears. The message of His life was clear: healing is possible, and love is the greatest force we can share.

As we reflect on this sacred event, we are reminded of the values that Jesus embodied—love, compassion, and acceptance. His life serves as a model for how we can interact with one another. In a world that often feels divided and filled with discord, we are called to fill our hearts with love and acceptance. This means embracing one another’s differences, offering kindness even in challenging situations, and recognizing the inherent worth in every person.

The beauty of this holy night lies not only in its historical significance but also in its invitation to us. We are encouraged to share the light that Jesus brought into the world. By extending love and acceptance to those around us, we create ripples of positivity that can transform our communities. Each act of kindness becomes a reflection of the love we have received, illuminating the lives of others just as the star guided the shepherds to the manger.

Let us take this message to heart as we move through our daily lives. It is easy to get caught up in our own concerns and challenges, but when we choose to prioritize love and acceptance, we contribute to a more compassionate world. Whether it’s through a smile to a stranger, a helping hand to someone in need, or simply listening with an open heart, we can embody the spirit of that holy night.

As we celebrate the birth of our Savior, let us remember that His legacy is one of healing and hope. The quiet holy night serves as a reminder that even in moments of stillness, profound change can occur. By filling our hearts with love and acceptance and sharing it with one another, we honor His gift to us.

In doing so, we not only celebrate His birth but also carry forward His mission—creating a world where everyone feels valued and loved. This is our calling: to be vessels of hope and healing in a world that desperately needs it. Let us embrace this beautiful opportunity to reflect on His love and allow it to guide our actions every day.

A Prayer to the Infant King

In the quiet of a winter's night, beneath a sky adorned with stars, a humble manger cradles the hope of the world. To this divine child, wrapped in swaddling clothes and surrounded by the warmth of animals, I bring my heartfelt plea.

Sweet baby Jesus, your arrival heralded a new era of miracles and boundless love. It is to you, in your innocence and infinite power, that I turn my eyes and heart. My husband, once strong and vibrant, now battles the relentless waves of PNES. Each day brings new challenges, unpredictable storms that shake the foundations of our life together.

As I stand by his side, I feel the weight of being his anchor in this turbulent sea. The roles of caregiver, provider, and partner blend into a tapestry of love and exhaustion. Yet, in the depths of my weariness, I find strength in the thought of you, the infant king who would grow to heal the sick and comfort the burdened.

I imagine your tiny hands, so small yet capable of moving mountains and calming seas. It is these hands I ask to touch my husband, to soothe his troubled mind and body. May your divine intervention flow through him, restoring balance, peace, and health.

In the long hours of the night, when silence amplifies our struggles, I picture the serenity of that holy night in Bethlehem. Let that same peace descend upon our home, wrapping us in comfort and hope. Grant us the miracle of healing, the gift of renewed strength, and the blessing of your endless love.

Sweet baby in the manger, as you brought light into a world of darkness, shine your healing light upon us. Make my husband whole again, that he may rise from this challenge renewed in body and spirit. Give me the endurance to continue this journey, to balance the myriad responsibilities with grace and love.

As the world celebrates your birth with joy and wonder, we await our own miracle with faith and patience. In your divine mercy, hear this prayer from a heart full of love and hope. For in you, precious child, all things are possible, and through you, miracles are born.

The Enduring Light of Hope: Reflections on a Silent Night

In a world that often feels chaotic and overwhelming, it’s easy to lose sight of hope. Yet, when I reflect on that silent night so long ago, I find a profound source of inspiration. It was in the humble surroundings of a stable, under a blanket of stars, that hope was born for all of humanity.

On that night, the world was not unlike our own filled with uncertainty and strife. Yet, amidst the turmoil, a light emerged. The birth of a child in such simple circumstances reminds us that hope can arise in the most unexpected places. It teaches us that even in our darkest moments, something beautiful can emerge.

This story resonates deeply today. As we navigate through challenges, whether they be personal struggles or global issues, we can draw strength from the message of that silent night. It symbolizes resilience, love, and the promise of new beginnings. Just as the shepherds and wise men found joy and purpose in that moment, we too can find solace and hope in our lives.

The world may seem crazy at times, but the essence of that night serves as a reminder that hope is always within reach. It encourages us to believe in the possibility of change and renewal. Each act of kindness, every moment of compassion, reflects that original hope—a hope that continues to inspire us to create a better world.

As we celebrate this season, let us carry forward the spirit of that silent night. Let it remind us to seek out hope in our everyday lives and to share it with others. In doing so, we honor the legacy of that moment and contribute to a brighter future for all.

A Grown-Up Christmas Wish: Healing, Peace, and Compassion

As the holiday season unfolds around me, I find my thoughts drifting to a different kind of Christmas list. Gone are the days of wishing for toys or gadgets; instead, my heart yearns for something far more profound and impactful. This year, my grown-up Christmas list is both deeply personal and universally resonant.

At the top of my list is a fervent wish for my husband. I long to see him find peace and relief from the grip of PNES (Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures). This condition, invisible to the outside world, has cast a shadow over our lives, challenging us in ways we never anticipated. I dream of a day when he can wake up without the fear of an episode, when he can fully engage in life without the constant worry of when the next seizure might strike. This wish isn't just about physical healing; it's about restoring his sense of self, his confidence, and the joy that PNES has too often eclipsed.

Expanding my wish beyond our personal sphere, I find myself longing for a world transformed. I envision a global community where hatred, violence, and the mistreatment of others become relics of the past. It's a bold wish, perhaps, but one that feels more urgent with each passing day. I dream of news headlines that speak of unity rather than division, of people coming together across differences instead of being torn apart by them. This wish is for a world where every person, regardless of their background, can walk down the street without fear, can express themselves freely, and can live their lives with dignity and respect.

Perhaps the most challenging part of my wish is for those who inflict pain and suffering on others to experience a profound change of heart. I think of the coworkers whose actions contributed to my husband's condition, and I wish for them—and others like them—to undergo a transformation. I imagine a miracle where cruelty is replaced by kindness, where indifference gives way to empathy. It's a wish for the bullies, the abusers, and the indifferent to have their hearts broken open, not in a way that causes pain, but in a way that allows compassion to flood in.

In this vision, I see the powerful ripple effect that such changes could create. Each person who turns from cruelty to kindness becomes a beacon of hope, influencing those around them. Workplaces become supportive communities rather than sources of stress and trauma. Neighborhoods transform into havens of mutual care and respect. The impact of this shift would be immeasurable, potentially alleviating conditions like PNES that are often triggered or exacerbated by stress and trauma.

While this Christmas list may seem idealistic, I believe in the power of collective hope and action. Each of us has the capacity to contribute to this vision in our daily lives. By choosing kindness, by standing up against injustice, by offering support to those who are struggling, we can each play a part in making these wishes a reality.

As I reflect on this grown-up Christmas list, I'm filled with a mix of longing and hope. The challenges we face—both personally with my husband's PNES and globally with the state of our world—are significant. Yet, I hold onto the belief that change is possible. This Christmas, my wish is not just a passive hope but a call to action—for healing, for peace, and for the transformation of hearts. It's a reminder that the true spirit of the season lies in our capacity for love, compassion, and the courage to create a better world for all.

Embracing a Well-Deserved Break

For the next 16 days, I am stepping away from the demands of work, and I can hardly express how liberating that feels. This break represents more than just time off; it symbolizes a much-needed respite from the challenges and stresses that have weighed heavily on my heart and mind.

In the workplace, I have faced not only the pressures of deadlines and responsibilities but also the emotional toll of navigating a toxic culture. The presence of bullies and individuals who have contributed to Tim's struggles with PNES has created an environment that is not just unwelcoming but draining. For too long, I have had to put on a brave face, dealing with their negativity while trying to support Tim through his health challenges.

Now, with this break ahead of me, I can finally breathe. I don’t have to confront the daily stressors that have become all too familiar. Instead, I can focus on what truly matters—my well-being, my family, and my own mental health. This time away is an opportunity to recharge, to reflect, and to find clarity away from the chaos.

During these 16 days, I plan to immerse myself in the love and support that surround me. I want to be present for Tim as he navigates his journey with PNES. Together, we can create moments filled with joy and connection, free from the distractions and negativity of work. We can explore new activities, share laughter, and simply enjoy each other’s company without the looming stress of external pressures.

This break is also a chance for me to rediscover joy in simple pleasures. Whether it’s curling up with a good book, taking long walks in nature, or indulging in hobbies that bring me happiness, I intend to embrace every moment fully. It’s about reclaiming my time and prioritizing self-care—something that has been overshadowed by work-related stress for far too long.

As I step away from the toxic environment of work, I hope to gain a fresh perspective on my situation. Distance often brings clarity, allowing us to see things we might have overlooked when caught up in the daily grind. This time off will give me space to reassess my priorities and consider what steps I need to take moving forward.

While this break is temporary, it offers a glimpse into what life could be like beyond the confines of a toxic workplace. It reminds me that I have the power to choose how I spend my time and who I allow into my life. It’s an opportunity to envision a future filled with positivity and support—one where Tim’s health journey is met with love rather than stress.

In these next 16 days, I choose freedom over fear, joy over stress, and love over toxicity. This break is not just an escape; it’s a celebration of resilience—a chance to honor myself and those I care about most. As I embrace this time away from work, I look forward to nurturing our bond and creating lasting memories together. Here’s to a period of renewal, reflection, and rediscovery—one that will empower me as I eventually return stronger and more focused on what truly matters in life.

A Cardinal's Message: A Connection to Heaven

Today, as I sat on my deck, sipping a cup of tea, a vibrant cardinal landed gracefully on the railing. Its brilliant red feathers stood out against the backdrop of winter’s muted colors, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. As I watched this beautiful bird, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace wash over me. In that moment, I realized that the cardinal was more than just a bird; it was a powerful symbol of heaven and a reminder of the loved ones I hold dear.

Cardinals are often seen as messengers from those we have lost, a connection to the divine that transcends the boundaries of life and death. When this cardinal looked at me with its bright, inquisitive eyes, I felt as if it were reaching out, bridging the gap between our world and the next. It was as if my loved ones were sending a gentle reminder that they are still with me, watching over me and cheering me on from afar.

In that moment, I reflected on the love and memories shared with those who have passed. Each recollection brought warmth to my heart—laughter shared during family gatherings, quiet moments of understanding, and the lessons learned from their lives. The cardinal became a symbol of that enduring connection, reminding me that love knows no bounds. It is a thread that weaves through time and space, linking us to those who have gone before us.

Nature has an incredible way of providing comfort and solace when we need it most. The sight of the cardinal perched there was a gentle nudge to pause and appreciate the beauty around me. It reminded me to find joy in the present moment, to recognize that even in times of loss or struggle, there are signs of hope and love everywhere if we take the time to look.

As I continued to watch the cardinal, I felt inspired to honor the memory of my loved ones by carrying their spirit forward in my daily life. This beautiful bird served as a reminder to cherish every moment, to express love freely, and to celebrate the connections we share with one another. It encouraged me to keep their legacy alive through acts of kindness and compassion.

Eventually, the cardinal took flight, soaring into the sky with grace and purpose. As it disappeared from view, I felt a sense of calm wash over me. The encounter had left an indelible mark on my heart—a reminder that while our loved ones may no longer be physically present, their love continues to surround us.

In that brief moment with the cardinal, I was reminded that heaven is not just a distant place; it is woven into our lives through memories, signs, and moments of beauty. The love we share transcends time and space, bringing us comfort and connection even in their absence. Today’s encounter was not just a fleeting moment; it was a beautiful affirmation of life’s continuity—a reminder that love endures beyond all boundaries.

The True Meaning of Gift-Giving

As the holiday season unfolds and we find ourselves in the hustle and bustle of searching for those last perfect gifts, it’s important to pause and reflect on the deeper significance of this time of year. Amidst the chaos of shopping, wrapping, and planning, we are reminded that the essence of gift-giving transcends material items.

In our quest for the perfect presents for our loved ones, let us remember that God bestowed upon us the greatest gift of all: His Son. This divine gift is not just a story told during Christmas; it represents unconditional love, hope, and redemption. The arrival of Jesus in the humble setting of a manger signifies a profound act of grace, reminding us that true gifts come from the heart and are often found in unexpected places.

God’s gift to humanity is a testament to His love for us. It embodies the idea that we are cherished and valued beyond measure. Just as we seek to find gifts that bring joy to our friends and family, God’s gift was meant to bring joy, peace, and salvation to all. It invites us to reflect on what it means to give from a place of love and compassion.

As we select gifts for those we care about, let’s strive to embody the spirit of generosity that God exemplified. The best gifts are not always the most expensive or extravagant; they are often those that come with thoughtfulness and intention. A heartfelt note, a shared experience, or a simple gesture can carry more meaning than any material possession.

This season is also an opportunity to strengthen our connections with others. In giving and receiving gifts, we create moments of joy and togetherness that enrich our relationships. Let us remember that the act of giving is not solely about the items exchanged but about fostering love, understanding, and community.

As we navigate through the final days leading up to the holidays, let us take a moment to reflect on our blessings. The gift of family, friends, health, and faith are treasures that cannot be wrapped or placed under a tree but are invaluable nonetheless. In recognizing these blessings, we cultivate gratitude in our hearts.

As we search for those last perfect gifts this holiday season, may we carry with us the reminder that God has already given us the ultimate gift in His Son. Let this knowledge inspire us to give generously from our hearts, to cherish our loved ones deeply, and to embrace the true spirit of this season—a spirit rooted in love, connection, and gratitude.

In doing so, we create a beautiful tapestry of giving that honors both our relationships and the profound gift that has been given to us all. This holiday season is not just about what we give but about celebrating the love that unites us—a love that reflects the greatest gift ever given.